Follow your gut....right!

Well, it's as if putting it out in the world scared him away??? That said guy from the last post seems to have dropped off the face of the planet...and randomly at that. Guess there's a good reason why meeting the kids never happened. 

Needless to say, lesson learned! And I can confidently say, I'm ready to start meeting new people with the hopes to dating!  I've though I was ready for a while, but now that I've done it once I KNOW I am...which is exciting and scary. 

So if anyone knows a normal, family primates man who isn't currently married please send him my way 😉

Normal is a key factor I've learned. It's scary how weird some people are, really scary. 

And well dating alone now a days is scary. Long gone are the days where your friends introduced you, your hang out a few time then go out alone. Well, maybe that does still happen, just not with people I know. Fun how when I would mentioned said man who's MIA, how many people I know that meet there partners/husbands online. So it is possibly to find a happy ever after....if you have the patience to weed out all the lonely, losers who are out for one thing!

Wish me luck 

  

Time is flying past...

It's been over a month? Where has the time gone?

Where do I start???

Well, all 3 boys passed to their next grade level🎉. I've hit and surpassed by personal goal weight 🎉, and I've actually been talking to a guy 😮🎉

First the boys....Alex is officially a teen? Not sure how 13yrs have passed so quickly but I can't be prouder of the hurtles he has over come in the last year. This time last year we (him and I) were stressing about after school daycare for him, how he would make out in junior high, and all the changes that brings. He did amazing, his grades have slipped a bit, but we will work that much harder this year. He rocked his first year of scouts, he loved it! This coming year, we are looking at the possible of no after school care (ekkkk), going away for a 5day sleep away camp, he's a volunteer at the summer day camp and has grown so much! Very proud momma

Dalton, has hit the typical preteen stage (in step behind his brother), his anxiety is still threw the roof, even with new medication. We are still looking at more options. He's enrolled in soccer again this summer. This year it's a mixed league which he loves. Sadly I believe this will be his last year as he finds it hard to "fit" in. One he's still new to soccer and 2 because he's "overweight" compared to the rest of the kids he played against. But who knows what the winter will bring. I hope he continues cause you can see how much he loves it.

 

Nathan...well he's still Nathan! He's still a talkative, smart mouthed, hilarious 5 year old...yep my baby is 5....CRAZY 😳

His allergies are still all over the place, food wise we have had a good handle on them with no major issues lately...thankfully. However his environmental allergies have gone crazy. He's on daily medication, puffers and still needs some emergency medications someday. He's booked to have surgery the end of August (not for his kidneys...still waiting to see what that will bring), afterward I have to keep him still for a week. He will have 3-4 incisions with multiple stitches in his stomach and groin area. This kid is never still, never quite, never dull....it will be a long week that's for sure. 

As for myself, I've surpassed my personal weigh lose goal. I'm currently down 171lbs!!! Last time I talked to my surgeon he said I needed to be at 175lbs and maintain that for 3-6 months before he will refer me to the plastic surgeon. 

I'm truly afraid to lose another 15lbs and then have the skin removed. That would put me down to like 145-150lbs....I'm 5'11" tall and although it would be consider "normal" BMI it's way to small.

I'm documenting "maintaining" my weight and hopefully when I see him in September he will be content with me at this size and refer me...then it's a weighing game to see if the insurance will cover it. I will pay for an upgrade to get a tummy tuck as well (the panni only removes the lower apron of skin....nothing above the belly button and they don't give me a belly button either). 

I would love to be able to afford a breast reduction as well but I don't think that's in my budget sadly 😩

And....so this may/will come as a huge surprise to some....well all of you (especially my bestie) but I've been talk to a guy I meet for about a month now...ekkkk. We have meet, we text, we chat, and we both can't wait to see where this will lead. I will admit, this is the first I'm saying any of this out loud to anyone other then him. I will also admit that meet/dating (which seems really weird to say not that we're at that point yet) is very difficult when we both have kids, I've got mine 24/7, we both work crazy scheduled and he lives about 30 mins away. It's not that we don't have time to see each other more, but with taking it slow, the down time we do have there's generally kids around and we both agree we need to get to know each other better before taking that step. That being said, it's nice to have someone to chat with after the kids are in bed, it's nice to go and meet for coffee (even if it feels like we  are high school  kids sneaking around behind our kids....I mean parents backs)

As I've mentioned before, I rely on my parents to watch my kids, I don't have a "babysitter". And well as much as I'm sure my parents will be excited for me, I'm not sure I'm ready for all the questions that will bring. 

Either way, we will make this work, we will wait it out and hopefully in the near future we will both be comfortable enough to share "our" time with those closes to us. 

I've missed that butterfly feeling you get when you wake up in the morning to find a text on your phone, when your phone rings in the middle of day and it's not the school/daycare/doctor calling. I've missed all that this brings and I'm excited to see what happens. 

Hopefully my next post won't be a month from now....LOL

How does time go so quick?

I feel like every second of the day is going by at warp speed lately? I can't believe that almost 7wks ago we came back from Florida? Seriously,it feels like we landed yesterday. 

I've always been told the older you get the faster time goes and I now believe it. 

Scary as it seems in 7.5 short days I will be the mom of a teenager??? Say what???

My babe, my first born, my little man, will officially become...a TEEN 😳

I will admit, this time last year it really freaked me out, but Alex has grown and matured SOOO much in the past 9 months there are days where I shake my head and wonder where this kid came from. 

Not only has changing to a middle school improved his self confidence, it's help his social skills. On top of moving up to Scouts (which have I expressed just how much he LOVES Scouts?!?!), if you didn't know better or seen him at home you may not even realize that Alex has high functioning Autism. 

He's now able to make it threw school, after school program and most of the evening with minimal out burst. I've noticed, school has noticed and his leaders have praised how far he has come this year. And when we do you can just see him beam with pride. 

This summer Alex will be taking a LIT course (leadership in training) and when he passe he will be a camp counsellor volunteer. Not only will this be extremely helpful for him to build his skills, it also helps me as daycare for a 13yr old is not easy or cheap to find.  

Alex is also signed up for a week long sleep over camp in August, threw Scouts. If the camp wasn't so expensive he could have gone for more then a week. Maybe next summer (which would give me a chance to save more). 

It's a bitter sweet moment in my life as I realize what a smart,independent young man I am raising. 

I hope that all the leaps and bounds you have come this year only double or triple in the next year 

Happy 13th Birthday big Man! I'm so very very proud of you         

Roller Coasters Rides

Well hello! 

Yes I'm still alive!!! Yes we made to and from Florida (and loved every single minute of it), we are officially into the nice warm weather back at home as well and I have been beyond busy with house repairs, yard clean up and just over all enjoying life 😘

There has been a couple times where I've started to write a new blog, got about half way done and realized, bananas this isn't going to make sense to anyone cause I haven't written in like 8wks 😳

This is a good thing right??? 

Let's sum up the last couple weeks

Florida was amazing, my body never hurt once single time we were there! I considered moving but well ya know 

We came home to snow....2 days in a row. Yuck

Alex went in his first out of town Scout trips, they went to the Dorchester International  Brotherhood camp about 3 hrs from home and he loved every single minute of it. He is signed up to do a week long scout camp this summer at Camp Samac (which is about 35 minutes a way). Him and I had our big date to go see WWE live (as part of his birthday present). 

Dalton has been a ball of emotions,thankfully we go back to his doctor next week. Something need to give with this child before we end up back where we were 3 yrs ago. He is headed to camping this weekend coming and is very excited. This will be his first camp trip alone with Cubs (the scouts are not attending this one). We find out next week wether or not he will do another years of Cubs (which I hope) or be moving up to Scouts (personally I don't believe he is ready). He also starts soccer this week. We have join a different league this year in hopes that he will actually know people on his team (down fall to living in the country) 

Nathan is ...well Nathan! We are still waiting to hear from Sick Kids hospital on when his surgery will be (hopefully August so he doesn't miss school). He started soccer tonight (cause the Monday of a long weekend is the perfect time to start)

Other wise he's doing good. Lots of Ashmtha issues in the last couple weeks. He's now on new medication and it seems to be helping as long as he's not outside for long periods of time (which with him is hard). No major food allergy issues, however it is the time of year were we are out and about more and we've had a couple close calls. Thankfully I am the annoying person who ask to read all labels! Sometimes twice or three times

As for me, well, I'm down 151lbs. Making me no longer obese, just overweight...lol My BMI is now 30....down from 51.7!!!

I'm loving the amount of energy I have! I've accomplished more in the last 3-4wks around my house then I could have ever imagined. 98% of it was without help!!!!  I'm now going for bike rides with the boys (wish we could go further and longer but Nathan's just not there yet)

I wish I could just keep moving, sitting still drives me crazy now....LOL

Still having issues with getting light headed and dizzy. But I'm trying to keep my sodium levels up (as gross as salt is)

I am so thankful that I made this decision for myself. I only wish I would have done it sooner. 

My ex is still a royal pain, he still hasn't seen the kids, still forgets to call on his night, still screwing me over on stuff that he shouldn't. (I'm now the own of 2 vehicle....unfortunately) everything wrong in his life is still my fault (and always will be) but the kids and I are moving alone and on most days couldnt be happier....now to find me a real man to share this new life with 😉

Happy 10th Birthday middle man

It's hard to believe I'm now a parent of 2 kids who are double digits??? How did this happen???? How can it really be 10 years since we were all sitting in a room waiting to find out wither you were a boy or a girl....everyone was sure you were a girl but SUPRISE we were wrong!

The second SUPRISE was you were 10lbs 4oz.....thankfully you were also a c-section....LOL

You were the crankiest, crustiest child ever. You cries more then you smiled. You were awake more then you slept, and unless you were moving you were not quite. I was convinced if you had been my first child you would have been an only child....yes it was that bad! 

However at 9 months old we started to figure out why. You had so much fluid and pressure in your ears you where basically deaf. The day after you had your first set of tubs done you were a completely different boy. You smiled, you laughter, you ate, you SLEPT. Our worlds did a 180 and it was amazing!

Now here we are 10 years later and although your my strong willed child, you are one of the kindest, most caring children I know. You always think of others before yourself (minus your brother) yet you hold your ground when someone tries to make you do something you don't want.  

You have a thirt for knowledge that I hope you never fill, you love all thing old and amaze me with the facts you can retain. 

Happy 10th Birthday Crusty, can not wait to see what the next 10 bring 😁

One year ago....

I had my first set of appointments with the Bariatic Clinic. The day before the trip I took my measurement. I also took this photo the morning of my appointments 

To see this photo puts everything into prospective....WOW!

The day of my surgery I had lost 45lbs total. 

This is 6wks after surgery 

This was the first time I really seen the difference in myself. Ive never liked having photos take. So I don't have many with my children sadly

Today I took my measurements again, not only am I down 133lbs in 1 year I've also lost 65.5" total off my body 😮

I truly am greatfull for what this decision has gone for my life, my health and my family. My only regret is not doing it sooner (however I am a believer that everything happens for a reason and there must have been one for me waiting!)

This photo completely shocked me...I see the difference all the time now (especially in my clothes) but till I seen this side by side I never really seen the OVER all difference 

I can not wait to get to goal and hopefully be approved for skin removal surgery...till then....thank god for spanxs! 

And once again we have an issue....

NOTE; this was suppose to post a month ago????

So today the kids all did their valentines at school. I will admit I was scared to send Nathan as I know first hand how hard it is to find nut free stuff for this time of year (second to Easter). 

The principal called me 2 wks ago to talk about there Valentine's Day fundraiser they do and to ask my advice as they couldn't find that they could sell that was safe. 

Well needles to say this is what Nathan came home with today 

 So I will fully admit that I can't say for 100% that the suckers are not nut free, however from my experience if they were they would be clearly labeled!

The heart shaped chocolates I know for a fact are not! These are what the school normally sells for their fundraiser. 

I instantly emailed the principal with my concerns and anger that this is yet again happening. 

This could be my final draw, my sins life can't keep being put in danger!