Weeks out....life isn't going so good

I'm back to work full time (yaaaa),I'm still loosing weight (4more lbs....61 so far) however....I can't eat???

I did good with the full fluid stage, and as I try and transition into the purée stage I'm struggling...big time!

I can handle scrabbled eggs, thick soups, mashed veggies, 1tbsp of mash potatoe (no more). However I can't do chicken, beef, chilli or anything thicker. Even when puréed. It's driving me crazy. 

At this point I should be starting soft food and I can't keep purees down???

Breakfast is either a scramble egg or 1/3 cup of yogurt, 1/4 cup of oatmeal (ohhhh the excitement)

Lunch if at work....I stick to soups. I take 1 full cups an slipt it between 2 meals...with 2 soda crackers in each serving (yummy soggy crackers😝)

Supper...is where I'm willing to try something more puréed style (seeing as I generally get sick after trying I don't want to be doing that at work)

Tonight I had 1tbsp of puréed chicken and 2 tbsp of mashed veggies. Had maybe 2 baby spoon bites and that was it. I've tried puréed chilli, mashed potatoes with chicken, puréed roast beef and none of it stays

I go to my 1 month post op appointment next week (thankfully) and will hopefully get some answers....I'm still wondering if there is a sirture in there (and not just a swollen esophagus) 

Again I said I was going to be honest, wasn't going to sugar coat my experience. I don't want to scare anyone but I also don't want to make it seem like a walk in the park either 

2 week post op 😉

It's been 2 weeks since surgery and life is going good!

Been home for just over a week, starting puréed foods tonight.  I'm beyond stuffed!

I had 2tbsp of mash potatoes n chicken with my normal 2 tbsp of protein powder. It went down good but I feel like I'm going to explode! 

Over all healing is going well

Went back to work Sunday (shhhhh don't tell). Worked the hosptial and just took my time. Monday I worked my normal office shift. It was so nice to use my brain again!

Was able to catch everything up in 1 shift (not sure that's a good thing, but it's nice not to feel behind), did te hosptial again today and work at the new office job tomorrow. I've decided to take Friday to myself. And then I start a 10 day stretch. 

I weighted myself Sunday at my parents. I've lost 12lbs since surgery (or 58lbs since April 1). 

Over all I feel great! Mid afternoon I do get some pain in my actual stomach, I'm not over doing it but it's more so the muscles reconnecting. It's right between 2 incision. As long as I don't move my left arm, bend or sit up to quick I'm good. Easy right...LOL

So the journey continues....clothes are my becoming my enemy (but I guess I should get use to it for the next year or so) however I'm not complaining....seriously😝

Sharing someone else blog on Nut Allergies!

http://www.fillingupmycup.com/2012/10/a-letter-from-annoying-peanut-allergy.html?spref=fb&m=1

Now I'm not blog savy at all and I'm not even sure I'm allowed to do this however some on my FB shared this link today and it hit home....hard. 

I give full credit to this blogger and just want to say THANK YOU for putting my thoughts into words and sharing it with the world! 

No parent chooses to have a child that is "different" and thankfully only some are blessed to have them. So even if is seems like "we" are being annoying (bleeps) were NOT. WE are trying to keep are kids safe and allow them to grow up and feel "normal"

And yes the part brought tears to my eyes!

Week 3 of school

Alex and Dalton are half way threw their third week of school....they are both adjusting well!

Alex is slowly coming into his own as a middle schooler. Gym class is still a struggle, sadly not because he doesn't want to participate (which would normally be the issue) but because he needs to change in the locker room. He's very shy and very little compared to most 12yr olds. He's willing to change his top, it's the bottoms. Even today as it's a bomby 9 degrees out he decided he wants to wear shorts to school (this child wore a coat to school with pants up till the last week if school cause he was cold). I gave him some tips on how to change without people noticing and hopefully today will go good!

We've had some bumps with the after school program, but hopefully when were back on routine Monday it will be smooth sailing for the test of the year!

Dalton, is LOVING school, minus the homework. He's come out of his shell this year (yahhhhh). He's join cross country (but not confident enough to compete yet), he's helping out at after school daycare and just blossoming! 

Nathan is well....adjusting????

It's been a slow process but he on day 8 of being in full time JK. First day home was the note

"Nathan had a hard time listening today, please remind him we need to listen to the teachers". I get it, really I do. He's 4, he's social, he's active. He gets overly stimulated easly, nothing else was sent home the first week. Monday I check his bag

"Nathan is still having a hard time listening and follow routine, please continue to remind him"

Routine??? Is day 6...they are suppose to know the routine already? 

It was also the first time he took the bus to school. When I picked him up the driver says to me "he does like to sit does he?"

Ummm nope! He's a boy, he's 4 and he doesn't have a seatbelt on. So now our morning have a new routine....me going over all the different rules for the different places he goes in a single day. Ok general all the rules are the same, however in Nathan's head each place is completely different. 

It goes something like this

Me: we need to remember on the his we???

Nate: sit in our bums!

Me: at school we need to turn on?

Nate: our ears!

Me: we also need to....

Nate: do what the teacher asks and keep our hands to our self 

Sound easy right???? WRONG

Yesterday, I get a call from the VP (yes after my heart slowed down thinking something was wrong) apparently Nathan  kicked another child (perfect!) 

So at the end of the conversation it turns out that another child was pretending to be a zombie, Nathan is petrified of zombies. 

Neddles to say, yes he shouldn't have kicked the other child, yes he will need time to adjust. 

Last night was the open house at the younger boys school

I was chatting with Nathan's teacher and she says to me

"That child is so freaken cute! When I took him aside to remind him about our no hands in policy, he looks me straight in the eye, puts his hands in his hips and says "I didn't use my hands I used my feet!" She just about busted a gut laughing. She had to leave the room afterwards to collect herself. 

I'm like....I live with this every single day!

Good news....we have had ZERO issues with reaction!!!! Yes were only in week 2 but it's such a relief! A lot of the parents have asked lots of question, and are ao supportive!!! And I'm thankful

I expressed that my concern is as we head into Halloween and the holidays. Parents (especially in JK) love to send in homemade treats for the kids to share. 

Both the teacher and are are a little freaked out! We will be meeting to address this soon. I don't want to be the bitch and say NO homemade goodies. But I also don't want something to go horriably wrong either. The school has their next staff meeting in 2 wks so we will meet after that. 

Hope all your littles (and bigs) have adjusted well to the new school!

  

6 days post op...

Well I survived! Made it threw surgery on September 10. It been a heck of a ride. I have no plans to sugar coat my experience so if your looking for someone who will only share the positive aspects of surgery....I'm NOT the person you want!

In true fashion I arrived to the hospital super early...like 70mins early. Day surgery didn't even open till 6am. It was 4:50am. Emergency said I could wait in the hospital waiting room...perfect!

At 5:55 the nurse coming on duty asked if I was waiting for surgery, she took me upstairs and the morning began!

Went to the OR waiting room for 7:45, meet with Surgeon and doctors. And at 8:05 I walked into the OR!

Everything went amazing! Was in my room by 1pm (surgery was 2.5hr then recovery room). I was awake and going pee alone by 2:30pm. 

For supper I was able to have chicken broth and lemon jello....have I ever expressed how much I HATE lemon jello????

The first night went ok. I was told I need to drink 15ml every 15 mins. Ya that didn't happen 😫 I was luck to get 15 ml an hour. Everytime I had a drink I was in so much pain. Yes most of it was gas pain (I asked about walking, to help but they said not till morning), but it would sit on my chest like a brick. I felt like there was a giant lump in my chest and nothin could get past it. 

Wednsday night I just did what I had to for fluids, Thursday morning was worse, I drank maybe 15ml in 2 hours. And nothing was stayng down. Nothing. I was puking up foam. I couldn't even swollow my own siliva. It was bad, and it only got worse as the day went by. I ended up back on the iv and still continued to puke 

Friday morning after not being able to keep anything down for 36hrs they took me for a swollow test. Basically it was an upright X-ray, where you swollow this gross liquid and they watch it go down your espagus. He say "good it's going, going, going...oh shit!" Yep that was the radiologist says. 

He's like ok, try another sip?

I said if I put anything else in there your going to have a mess to clean up!

He insisted!  I asked for a container. 

The nurse gave me one. She could see my face turning green (not kidding she even said it to the doctor). 

So I took another drink and started gagging. He stopped the test and says...well you have a blockage. There's no leaks but it's not going threw correct. 

And then I puked and almost passed out

They put me back on the stretcher. Took me back up stairs were I contined to puke and puke some more (sorry I warned you this wasn't a pleasant post)

The doctor comes in about 30 mins later and said.... well???

I told him what the radioligist said and he's like there's no way you have a blockage this early. He went to check the report and came back. It wasn't a full blockage. My espagus was extremely swollow and nothing was gettin threw. He described it like a drip from the IV. Said he wanted to keep me the weekend and to go slow. It would get better. Keep walking and drinking. Needless to say I stayed in bed the rest of the day and never drank anything (thank god for IV fluids) I continued puking up till about 10:30-11pm.

Truthful moment here....Friday afternoon I told the nurse I regretted having this done. I knew it was a bump in the road but anything and everything I knew to make me feel better wasn't an option anymore. I has heartburn soooo bad I would have killed for a slice of plain bread and some chocolate milk (something that has always worked in me, especially while pregnate and I had acid reflux BAD). I was in pain and would have just loved to take a couple pills and call it a day. However again, it's no longer an option. 

Saturday I woke up and felt like a new person! I didn't have that heavy feeling in my chest (probably cause it was finally empty and rested)   Breakfast came and the though of even trying to drink something brought me to tears. The nurse you have to try, you have to be able to take in full fluids before we can realease you 

So I started SSLLOOWW. I measured out the 15mls and gave myself 30 mins to drink it all. It went ok, I couldn't have gone fast if I tried. Between "feeds" I started walking (see the stubborn side coming back??? Sure sign I'm feeling better) I would do 3 laps around the ward come back, pee (cause of course IV fluids do that to you) and start in my next 15ml! 

It took me 2.5 hours to drinks 60mls. 

But I did it and never puked! I continued on clear fluids for the day and did ok. Couldn't (and still can't) drink the 30mls in 15mins (day 2 post op goal). 

Suday for breakfast they bumped me back up to full fluids. I was served cream of wheat 😝 and apple sauce! I was excited about the apple sauce...it wasn't lemon jello! As much as I love me some apple sauce...my stomach doesn't. I was getting that feeling again. This wasn't going good. I stopped eating and went walking. At this point I was doing laps of 5!!! Grabbed some ice chips cause I would keep them in now!!! And went back and decided apple sauce wasn't for me!

Lunch came and they served me cream of mushroom soup (minus the mushrooms) smelled horrid, looked horrid but it was soooo yummy!!! No issues at all eatting it. Toke me 90 mins to eat the whole serving! I was excited, my nurse was excited and I was finally looking forward to going home. 

To my super my surgeon showed up around 2:30pm!!! Asked how I was, asked how I was eating. I explained. He saids good! Feel up to leaving??? 

Sure??? Kind of confused, excited but confused.  

I was free to go....if I could fill my prescription. Ok I'm up for the challenge. 

I called 10 yes 10 pharmacy to see if they carried the injectable blood thinners I would need. Finally after over an hour I found one that would be about a 15 min detour from route home. Texted my dad and said I'm free!

All went well. He picks me up. We get to the pharmacy and yes they received the fax the hospital sent, however because I wasn't in the system he didn't fill it. Are you kidding me???

So with the fax in hand he adds me to the system. Not once did he ask me a question? All the info was on the fax ( not the first time I've done this). It was an hour later that I was finally able to leave. He got the fax at 3pm we got to the pharmacy at 5:15 left at 6:20????

So now I'm home, the kids are all at school. Yes even little man!!! Resting, eating, and just taking it easy. 

I no longer regret my decision ( I'm sure at some point I will again but it will pass!)

I'm excited to continue my new journey!

As of September 10 I was down 45lbs and 27 inches... Not shabby for a flabby 😉

T-5 days....

Or as I like to say, 28 more shakes!!!

Yep I'm at the point I'm now counting down how many more shakes I have till surgery!

All my logistics have been worked out! My dad is getting off early to drive me to the hospital Wednesday morning, then get off early again Friday to pick me up (he truly is the best!)

Mom is come to stay Tuesday night, the kids all have daycare and after school programs situated! 

Work life is all sorted! I've convinced them I'd be healed and ready to return 12 days after surgery (little nervous but they are all understanding and told me to take it slow!). I'm truly blessed to work for the people I do

So now I just need to get threw the next 5 days, pack my bag and I'm off to my new life....can't wait to join the "loser" bench!

OH ya I almost forgot....I'm down 15lbs since Aug 17!!!!

That makes 40lbs total since April....now only 155 to go!