Stress, stress and MORE stress

While I still can't get into details about what's hapening I can share that my stress level has been threw the roof this past week. My anxiety level is on the brinks of getting the best of me (I'm fighting SOOOOO hard) 

Life as I've been use to living is completely thrown for a loop and I have to re evaluate every aspect again. 

I haven't filed the boys in yet as to what's going on either, nor do they know that this weekend when I say their not going to their dads that it's going to be an on going change. 

As of right now he no longer has overnight visits. And won't for a long time. 

He needs to earn back my trust in order to be alone with the children. He needs to prove he his head screwed in straight so to speak an unfortunately for me and the kids this could take months if not years (knowing his....were looking at least a year before he even start to attempt to make this situation right again)

Thankfully I've figured out my work schedule at the hospital threw to the end of March, my hours are picking up at the office as well. So the lack of money that should be coming in, may be covered for a short period of time. This is one of those situations where I wish I was more finacially stable and not so reliant on my support payments...but by the time this storm calms, that will have changed!!!!

People keep saying (as do I) "your only given what you can handle" BUT my goodness how much more can be thrown at me??? It's been an uphill struggle for over 2 years and everytime I get a chance to stop and breath....smash....a new wave hits and I'm fighting to breath again